Meet The Fellowship of the Lens'd Palm
A list of the members of our Conclave.
The Cinemania Society Podcast
Herein are chronicled the judgements of this not-so-secret society as its members scrutinize, criticize, analyze, brutalize, and otherwise vamp on the weirdest films in cinema history.
Listen on:
Episodes
4 days ago
4 days ago
Cinquisitor Ethan presents a field report on The Kentucky Fried Movie, a film that this society considers to be the textbook example of a critically endangered genre of film: the sketch comedy movie.
Written & performed by Ethan Ireland
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks used: "Mission Control" and "Ocean View."
LEGAL NOTICE: This is a work of parody and/or satire, and should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact. All celebrity voices are impersonated unless otherwise stated.
Wednesday Jun 24, 2026
Wednesday Jun 24, 2026
We re-broadcast Verifier Andy's Profile in Cinemania on Master Bad Guy-slash-Henchman Extraordinaire, Michael Ironside
Wednesday Jun 17, 2026
Wednesday Jun 17, 2026
Cinquisitor Ethan (with a heapin' helpin' of help from Verifier Andy) presents a Field Report on the CINEMANIA-inducing movie trope of post-apocalypticism. It might not have begun in the '80s, but if we learned anything from that decade, it was how to sell literally *anything,* even the end of the world.
Written by Andy Slack and Ethan Ireland, with additional material by Daniel Scribner
Performed by Ethan Ireland and Daniel Scribner
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks used: "Ghoul," "Killswitch," "Cube," and "Annihilation."
Additional music and sound effects courtesy of Epidemic Sound
Wednesday Jun 10, 2026
Wednesday Jun 10, 2026
Scrutinizer Zacharia presents a Field Report on the objectively CINEMANIA-inducing film from 1987: ROBOCOP! Perhaps the single most inappropriately-marketed sci-fi/action satire in existence, when it first came out this film left life-long scars on viewers who saw it at far too tender of an age. Scrutinizer Zacharia, Cinquisitor Ethan, Verifier Andy are among them.
Written by Zacharia Berks, Ethan Ireland, Andy Slack, and Hope Bravo
Performed by Zacharia Berks, Ethan Ireland, and Hope Bravo
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks used: "Iris," "Dead Channel," "The Optimist," "Destroyer," "Faces of Death," "Burnt Circuit," "Chaos Theory," "Whistler," and "Sunset Cruise."
LEGAL NOTICE: Cinemania Field Reports is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents appearing in this audioplay are either the product of the authors’ imagination or are used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living, dead, or living dead; or actual events is purely coincidental and/or part of a work of parody that should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact. All celebrity voices are impersonated unless otherwise stated. This work is protected under US Fair Use (17 USC Section 107), which allows for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research, and as such does not constitute an infringement of copyright.
Wednesday Jun 03, 2026
Wednesday Jun 03, 2026
Verifier Andy presents a Cinemania Field Report on an animated series he remembers from his bygone youth, a mind-buggeringly bizarre Japanese-French sci-fi animated series: ULYSSES-31, which is sort of like "The Odyssey" meets "Macross." Giant robots and mythology. It was a hell of a thing. Come let Brother Andy spin you a tale...and be cautious you don't develop CINEMANIA.
Written & performed by Andy Slack
Editing & sound design by Ethan Ireland
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks used: "Kiss in the Dark," "Almost Dawn," "Lost Era," and "Dream Sequence."
Wednesday May 27, 2026
Wednesday May 27, 2026
Cinquisitor Ethan, assisted (and annoyed) by Verifier Andy, presents a Cinemania Field Report on the 2003 film "Evil Alien Conquerors," a stand-out example of stoner cinema, marked for its level of CINEMANIA.
Written & performed by Ethan Ireland & Andy Slack
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks Used: "War Games" and "Consumed."
Wednesday May 20, 2026
Wednesday May 20, 2026
Cinquisitor Andy provides a Cinemania Field Report on a phenomenon he remembers having sprung up occasionally in his youth. No, I don't mean that way, you sickos.
Written and performed by Andy Slack
Production & sound design by Ethan Ireland
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Incidental music & sound courtesy of Epidemic Sound.
Wednesday May 13, 2026
Wednesday May 13, 2026
Verifier Andy presents a Cinemania Field Report on "The Strange World of Gurney Slade," one of the weirdest, rule-breaking-est television series to ever emerge from television - in Britain or anywhere else for that matter. Go on. Have a listen.
Written and performed by Andy Slack
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Track used "Awaken"
Cinquisitor Ethan,
Keeper of the Lenses
Brother Ethan is an award-winning filmmaker who has more than 20 years professional work in film & television production. He has worked on more than a dozen feature films, and has directed & produced several of his own projects: documentary features and short films. He is best recognized for the work he did on four seasons on the hit YouTube comedy series Smosh.
A self-styled intellectual, Cinquisitor Ethan has put many thousands of hours studying cinema apocrypha for interesting tidbits, and combing through the history for cinema for sources of CINEMANIA in order to study the devastating effects of this condition.
CINEMANIA Manifestations: The disorder in Cinquisitor Ethan can be fairly easy to observe. Although he is purportedly a native of California, when CINEMANIA begins to take hold in Cinquisitor Ethan, his accent becomes increasingly elaborate. He will shift into a Midatlantic accent, and even into an RP accent depending on the severity of the episode he is suffering. This can happen multiple times in a given conclave.
Verifier Andy,
Master Illuminator
Perhaps our most mysterious member, Brother Andy lurks somewhere in darkest Albion, magically honing his skills in comedy and illustration to a razor's edge.
Brother Andy's internet comics, including The Wisdom of Leto II and its sequel, FremCops, have achieved notoriety from their appearances in various Facebook shitposting groups such as Dune Sietchposting, Star Trek Shitposting, and others. He has these and numerous other self-published sci-fi & fantasy comics available on at andyslackcomics.com, and for sale on Ko-Fi.
In case you're wondering, no, he is not really Jack Black, so don't ask.
Scrutinizer Zacharia,
Guardian of the Door
A veteran of theater production, Brother Zacharia graduated from film school at California State University, Monterey Bay along with Brother Ethan, who has been his decades-long accomplice in the commission of cinematic crimes.
Brother Zacharia is a third-generation artist, descended from a line of visual artists, and has put much study into the causes and effects of CINEMANIA.
Profligator Daniel,
Possessor of the Word
Hailing from New Jersey, Brother Daniel writes for theater, literature, and cinema esoterica. He is somewhat of an expert on Troma Films, and was trained in writing short fiction by Harlon Ellison.
Profligator Daniel is the primary caregiver of Brother Clark-Nova, who is an unholy amalgamation of equal parts cockroach, manual typewriter, and portions of human anatomy best left unseen.
Arbiter Alessa,
Voice from the Outer World
Our youngest member, Arbiter Alessa attended film school in Los Angeles after producing a feature film of her own while still in high school. She has experience working professionally on features and shorts, and is a working voice actor for several notable anime series including Genshin Impact and Onyx Equinox.
Arbiter Alessa recently went on an extended vacation to Altair IV, where she encountered an atomic super-robot similar to (and more importantly, legally distinct from) Robby the Robot. After taking her new plastic pal on an interstellar pub-crawl, she returned to the Strip Mall of the Damned with the machine in tow, where she has since conducted several experiments on it (including the downloading of the entire internet into the robot's databanks).
Professor Andrea,
Scholar of San Francisco
Professor Andrea holds multiple degrees in film, Spanish, and music; and has taught all three. She has a deep knowledge of film history, and a history of work in film production, including on films with Cinquisitor Ethan.
Auntie Hope,
Keeper of the Books
Hope is a relative newcomer to the Society, and to the field of CINEMANIA as a whole. She granted herself membership status and a title after the Society were responsible for unleashing a horde of cannibalistic humanoid underground mutant people (C.H.U.M.P.s) that destroyed her family-friendly occult bookstore, The Laughing Tome. She intends to be as underfoot as possible until her store is repaired.