Meet The Fellowship of the Lens'd Palm
A list of the members of our Conclave.
The Cinemania Society Podcast
Herein are chronicled the judgements of this not-so-secret society as its members scrutinize, criticize, analyze, brutalize, and otherwise vamp on the weirdest films in cinema history.
Listen on:
Episodes
Wednesday Mar 25, 2026
Wednesday Mar 25, 2026
This week presents a Cinemania Field Report that explores the "spurious reality" film genre that may not have originated in the 1990s, but certainly defined the decade in the way that post-nuclear apocalypse films defined the 1980s. Cinquisitor Ethan explores key films of the era, examines the underlying anxieties that drove this trend, and speculates on why it has largely faded in recent years.
Written by Ethan Ireland and Andy Slack
Performed by Ethan Ireland, Mark Hennessy-Barrett, and Andy Slack
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks used: Atomic Punk, Mass Extinction, Doomsday, Future War, Fermi Paradox
This is a work of parody and/or satire and should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact. All celebrity voices are impersonated unless otherwise stated.
Excerpt from the BBC Radio 4 programme "The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy" by Douglas Adams (C) 1978 is used here pursuant to UK "Fair Dealing" law and US "Fair Use" law (17 U.S.C. § 107) in that it is for the purposes of non-commercial research or study, criticism, or review.
Wednesday Mar 18, 2026
Wednesday Mar 18, 2026
The mystery surrounding Scrutinizer Zacharia's lost memories deepens as the gang goes into their individual analyses and judgements over 1998's neo-noir sci-fi thriller "Dark City." Shit gets a little weird, yo.
Written & performed by
Daniel Scribner
Andy Slack
Hope Bravo
Andrea Palladino
Zacharia Berks
Ethan Ireland
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Incidental music and sound effects courtesy of Epidemic Sound
LEGAL NOTICE: The Cinemania Society is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents appearing in this audioplay are either the product of the authors’ imagination or are used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living, dead, or living dead; or actual events is purely coincidental and/or part of a work of parody that should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact. All celebrity voices are impersonated unless otherwise stated.
Wednesday Mar 11, 2026
Wednesday Mar 11, 2026
Auntie Hope presents a profile on Jennifer Connelly, who has been considered one of the most beautiful women in the world for more than four decades, and whom Hope suspects may be an asymptomatic carrier of CINEMANIA.
Written and performed by Hope Bravo
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks used: "Eternal Youth" and "Acacia"
Caricature art by Andy Slack Comics
LEGAL NOTICE: This is a work of parody and/or satire and should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact. All celebrity voices are impersonated unless otherwise stated.
Wednesday Mar 04, 2026
Wednesday Mar 04, 2026
During their conclave on Alex Proyas' 1998 sci-fi neo-noir, "Dark City," the gang pursues some clues that bubble up from the depths Scrutinizer Zacharia's subconscious, leading them to discover a horror only recently perpetrated in the food court, then onward into the depths of the Mysterious Mall of Misery...
Written & performed by
Daniel Scribner
Andy Slack
Hope Bravo
Andrea Palladino
Zacharia Berks
Ethan Ireland
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Incidental music and sound effects courtesy of Epidemic Sound
LEGAL NOTICE: The Cinemania Society is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents appearing in this audioplay are either the product of the authors’ imagination or are used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living, dead, or living dead; or actual events is purely coincidental and/or part of a work of parody that should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact. All celebrity voices are impersonated unless otherwise stated.
Wednesday Feb 25, 2026
Wednesday Feb 25, 2026
Profligator Daniel presents a Profile on the King of Weird, Richard O'Brien, best known for playing Riff-Raff in "The Rocky Horror Picture Show."
Written by Daniel Scribner
Performed by Daniel Scribner, Andy Slack, and Ethan Ireland
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks used: "Playback" and "Touch the Sky"
Caricature art by Andy Slack Comics
LEGAL NOTICE: This is a work of parody and/or satire and should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact. All celebrity voices are impersonated unless otherwise stated.
Wednesday Feb 18, 2026
Wednesday Feb 18, 2026
Scrutinizer Zacharia awakens in a bathtub to discover things may not be what they seem, which prompts him to call the Society to a Conclave analyzing the 1998 sci-fi neo-noir film "Dark City," by Alex Proyas. Spooky!
Written & performed by
Daniel Scribner
Andy Slack
Hope Bravo
Andrea Palladino
Zacharia Berks
Ethan Ireland
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Incidental music and sound effects courtesy of Epidemic Sound
LEGAL NOTICE: The Cinemania Society is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents appearing in this audioplay are either the product of the authors’ imagination or are used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living, dead, or living dead; or actual events is purely coincidental and/or part of a work of parody that should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact. All celebrity voices are impersonated unless otherwise stated.
Wednesday Feb 11, 2026
Wednesday Feb 11, 2026
Verifier Andy presents a memorial profile in Cinemania on one of Canada's greatest comediennes (and suspected distant relative of Cinquisitor Ethan): Catherine O'Hara, of "SCTV" and "Beetlejuice" fame.
Rest in power, Catherine. We hardly knew ye.
Written and performed by Andy Slack
Caricature art by Andy Slack Comics
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks used: "Last Night" and "Kowloon City."
LEGAL NOTICE: This is a work of parody and/or satire, and should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact.
Wednesday Feb 04, 2026
Wednesday Feb 04, 2026
We bring back "Cheapskate," written by Patrick Ireland and performed by Daniel Scribner. This story originally appeared in the October, 1988 issue of Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine and appears here with permission from the author.
Music used under license from APM
Sound effects courtesy of Epidemic Sound
Cinquisitor Ethan,
Keeper of the Lenses
Brother Ethan is an award-winning filmmaker who has more than 20 years professional work in film & television production. He has worked on more than a dozen feature films, and has directed & produced several of his own projects: documentary features and short films. He is best recognized for the work he did on four seasons on the hit YouTube comedy series Smosh.
A self-styled intellectual, Cinquisitor Ethan has put many thousands of hours studying cinema apocrypha for interesting tidbits, and combing through the history for cinema for sources of CINEMANIA in order to study the devastating effects of this condition.
CINEMANIA Manifestations: The disorder in Cinquisitor Ethan can be fairly easy to observe. Although he is purportedly a native of California, when CINEMANIA begins to take hold in Cinquisitor Ethan, his accent becomes increasingly elaborate. He will shift into a Midatlantic accent, and even into an RP accent depending on the severity of the episode he is suffering. This can happen multiple times in a given conclave.
Verifier Andy,
Master Illuminator
Perhaps our most mysterious member, Brother Andy lurks somewhere in darkest Albion, magically honing his skills in comedy and illustration to a razor's edge.
Brother Andy's internet comics, including The Wisdom of Leto II and its sequel, FremCops, have achieved notoriety from their appearances in various Facebook shitposting groups such as Dune Sietchposting, Star Trek Shitposting, and others. He has these and numerous other self-published sci-fi & fantasy comics available on at andyslackcomics.com, and for sale on Ko-Fi.
In case you're wondering, no, he is not really Jack Black, so don't ask.
Scrutinizer Zacharia,
Guardian of the Door
A veteran of theater production, Brother Zacharia graduated from film school at California State University, Monterey Bay along with Brother Ethan, who has been his decades-long accomplice in the commission of cinematic crimes.
Brother Zacharia is a third-generation artist, descended from a line of visual artists, and has put much study into the causes and effects of CINEMANIA.
Profligator Daniel,
Possessor of the Word
Hailing from New Jersey, Brother Daniel writes for theater, literature, and cinema esoterica. He is somewhat of an expert on Troma Films, and was trained in writing short fiction by Harlon Ellison.
Profligator Daniel is the primary caregiver of Brother Clark-Nova, who is an unholy amalgamation of equal parts cockroach, manual typewriter, and portions of human anatomy best left unseen.
Arbiter Alessa,
Voice from the Outer World
Our youngest member, Arbiter Alessa attended film school in Los Angeles after producing a feature film of her own while still in high school. She has experience working professionally on features and shorts, and is a working voice actor for several notable anime series including Genshin Impact and Onyx Equinox.
Arbiter Alessa recently went on an extended vacation to Altair IV, where she encountered an atomic super-robot similar to (and more importantly, legally distinct from) Robby the Robot. After taking her new plastic pal on an interstellar pub-crawl, she returned to the Strip Mall of the Damned with the machine in tow, where she has since conducted several experiments on it (including the downloading of the entire internet into the robot's databanks).
Professor Andrea,
Scholar of San Francisco
Professor Andrea holds multiple degrees in film, Spanish, and music; and has taught all three. She has a deep knowledge of film history, and a history of work in film production, including on films with Cinquisitor Ethan.
Auntie Hope,
Keeper of the Books
Hope is a relative newcomer to the Society, and to the field of CINEMANIA as a whole. She granted herself membership status and a title after the Society were responsible for unleashing a horde of cannibalistic humanoid underground mutant people (C.H.U.M.P.s) that destroyed her family-friendly occult bookstore, The Laughing Tome. She intends to be as underfoot as possible until her store is repaired.