Meet The Fellowship of the Lens'd Palm
A list of the members of our Conclave.
The Cinemania Society Podcast
Herein are chronicled the judgements of this not-so-secret society as its members scrutinize, criticize, analyze, brutalize, and otherwise vamp on the weirdest films in cinema history.
Listen on:
Episodes
Wednesday Oct 18, 2023
Wednesday Oct 18, 2023
The latest VHS Brother Methuselah has dredged up is one where Auntie Hope presents a Profile in Cinemania on Robert Picardo, ultimate "that guy" actor and everyone's favorite television doctor.
Written and performed by Hope Bravo
Music by Meteor at http://meteormusic.bandcamp.com/
Tracks: "Distant Worlds" and "Phantom Zone."
Legal notice: this is a work of parody.
Wednesday Oct 11, 2023
Wednesday Oct 11, 2023
Brother Methuselah has dug a VHS cassette from within the sweat-stained burlap sack he's been carrying on his back which contains a profile on Hollywood's Queen of Femmes Fatales, Sharon Stone.
Written and performed by Andrea Palladino
Music by Meteor at meteormusic.bandcamp.com
Tracks: "Slow Burn," "Silent Streets," and "Amethyst."
Legal notice: this is a work of parody.
Monday Oct 09, 2023
Monday Oct 09, 2023
The Writer's Guild strike is over, but the SAG-AFTRA strike continues. Listen for an update about the show and what's happening on the show...
Wednesday Oct 04, 2023
Wednesday Oct 04, 2023
We present another videocassette containing a profile by Verifier Andy on acclaimed Dutch director Paul Verhoeven, who is notable for being a major cause of CINEMANIA, not only in his home country of the Netherlands, but also the United States if not the entire world.
Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Tracks: "The Alchemist" and "Atlas."
Visit whitebataudio.com or karlcasey.bandcamp.com for more bitchin', royalty-free, stream-safe synthwave tracks.
Legal notice: this is a work of parody.
Wednesday Sep 20, 2023
Wednesday Sep 20, 2023
Cinquisitor Ethan presents a Profile on Hollywood's most-adapted author, paranoid prophet and accidental purveyor of CINEMANIA, Philip K. Dick.
Written and performed by Ethan Ireland
Music by Meteor at meteormusic.bandcamp.com
Tracks: "City Lights" and "Escape the Fate."
Legal notice: this is a work of parody and/or satire, and should not be construed as making statements or allegations of actual fact.
Wednesday Sep 13, 2023
Wednesday Sep 13, 2023
The Cinemania Society presents for your listening pleasure a short story by acclaimed author Patrick Ireland. This story is an unpublished work originally written sometime in the early 1990s. This recording is from a live performance by Ethan Ireland in 2016, at the Gold Lion Art Center for "Now Hear This!" produced by Atim Udoffia.
This episode is produced in memory of Clifford Childers, an amazingly talented musician who performed much of the live music backing the reading of "Slugger." Clifford died in February of 2023. He will be missed.
Sound design, mixing, and mastering by Ethan Ireland
Graphic Design by Andy Slack
Opening & Closing Credits Music by Karl Casey at White Bat Audio
Wednesday Sep 06, 2023
Wednesday Sep 06, 2023
Long after the heretical outcasts calling themselves the Cinemania Society made the their hair's-breadth escape from Cap'n McBloodgulper's Restaurant and Tiki Bar, they find themselves hungry, wet, and footsore on the outskirts of Nowhere, America. They take refuge in an abandoned museum, where they hold their next conclave on Mamoru Oishii's obscure but meaningful and highly influential 1985 animated feature, Tenshi no Tamago, a/k/a Angel's Egg. What horrors await the renegades of the Society, and worse still, its listeners?
Wednesday Aug 30, 2023
Wednesday Aug 30, 2023
Profligator Daniel presents a VHS cassette containing a profile on noted Japanese classical music composer Yohihiro Kanno. Or was it anime score composer Yoko Kanno? You know what, we can't even tell anymore...
Written and performed by Daniel Scribner
Music by Karl Casey @ White Bat Audio
Tracks: "Sakura," "Polymath," and "Waves."
Legal notice: this is a work of parody.
Cinquisitor Ethan,
Keeper of the Lenses
Brother Ethan is an award-winning filmmaker who has more than 20 years professional work in film & television production. He has worked on more than a dozen feature films, and has directed & produced several of his own projects: documentary features and short films. He is best recognized for the work he did on four seasons on the hit YouTube comedy series Smosh.
A self-styled intellectual, Cinquisitor Ethan has put many thousands of hours studying cinema apocrypha for interesting tidbits, and combing through the history for cinema for sources of CINEMANIA in order to study the devastating effects of this condition.
CINEMANIA Manifestations: The disorder in Cinquisitor Ethan can be fairly easy to observe. Although he is purportedly a native of California, when CINEMANIA begins to take hold in Cinquisitor Ethan, his accent becomes increasingly elaborate. He will shift into a Midatlantic accent, and even into an RP accent depending on the severity of the episode he is suffering. This can happen multiple times in a given conclave.
Verifier Andy,
Master Illuminator
Perhaps our most mysterious member, Brother Andy lurks somewhere in darkest Albion, magically honing his skills in comedy and illustration to a razor's edge.
Brother Andy's internet comics, including The Wisdom of Leto II and its sequel, FremCops, have achieved notoriety from their appearances in various Facebook shitposting groups such as Dune Sietchposting, Star Trek Shitposting, and others. He has these and numerous other self-published sci-fi & fantasy comics available on at andyslackcomics.com, and for sale on Ko-Fi.
In case you're wondering, no, he is not really Jack Black, so don't ask.
Scrutinizer Zacharia,
Guardian of the Door
A veteran of theater production, Brother Zacharia graduated from film school at California State University, Monterey Bay along with Brother Ethan, who has been his decades-long accomplice in the commission of cinematic crimes.
Brother Zacharia is a third-generation artist, descended from a line of visual artists, and has put much study into the causes and effects of CINEMANIA.
Profligator Daniel,
Possessor of the Word
Hailing from New Jersey, Brother Daniel writes for theater, literature, and cinema esoterica. He is somewhat of an expert on Troma Films, and was trained in writing short fiction by Harlon Ellison.
Profligator Daniel is the primary caregiver of Brother Clark-Nova, who is an unholy amalgamation of equal parts cockroach, manual typewriter, and portions of human anatomy best left unseen.
Arbiter Alessa,
Voice from the Outer World
Our youngest member, Arbiter Alessa attended film school in Los Angeles after producing a feature film of her own while still in high school. She has experience working professionally on features and shorts, and is a working voice actor for several notable anime series including Genshin Impact and Onyx Equinox.
Arbiter Alessa recently went on an extended vacation to Altair IV, where she encountered an atomic super-robot similar to (and more importantly, legally distinct from) Robby the Robot. After taking her new plastic pal on an interstellar pub-crawl, she returned to the Strip Mall of the Damned with the machine in tow, where she has since conducted several experiments on it (including the downloading of the entire internet into the robot's databanks).
Professor Andrea,
Scholar of San Francisco
Professor Andrea holds multiple degrees in film, Spanish, and music; and has taught all three. She has a deep knowledge of film history, and a history of work in film production, including on films with Cinquisitor Ethan.
Auntie Hope,
Keeper of the Books
Hope is a relative newcomer to the Society, and to the field of CINEMANIA as a whole. She granted herself membership status and a title after the Society were responsible for unleashing a horde of cannibalistic humanoid underground mutant people (C.H.U.M.P.s) that destroyed her family-friendly occult bookstore, The Laughing Tome. She intends to be as underfoot as possible until her store is repaired.